Went to marina with my parents and sis just now. and we came back like around 10.30 ! hahaha.
my parents are SO childish i tell you, they played on the travellator. LOL.
anyway....nothing much to blog about today. it's elearning day and the sec ones have lots of work! HAHAHAHA. (:
sec 2 is the best we only have a few assignments. :D
(but i haven't started on them!)
BUDDY(: : HARRO ! LOL. REPLIED. :P
SHARMAINE: HAHHA well i haven't done anything what! soon soon (:
jean: hello! oh cause she didn't keep sweet for me! ): this kind of buddy. ): so disappointed! hahaha, YEAH my favourite cheer hehehe. so cute right! :P
jiarong: HELLO :D awww don't cry leh! cheer up (: there's still choir ! hahah, then we can have loads of fun like we always did (: muchlove.♥
charis: hello again. i dont think you are a hooligan, never did, and do not hope to see you as one. by making that statement i didn't mean that you will walk around and just spew vulgarities. but from what i see- even if you're saying wtf as what the fish, you know what that jolly well means. so, you get my point from here onwards.
second, nobody actually looks terrible because of their face, which is what they are born as. however people can make themselves look terrible. it only matters to what extent. Like your school uniform : folded skirts and untucked shirts - do you think they look nice? not at all! 1, is it even that difficult to just tuck in your shirt, it's not as though we make you tuck it in all the way. it's understandable if your shirt gets untucked after say PE lessons, but also you have to ensure you tuck it in again afterwards. but now , not only you don't go around in untucked shirts after having pe lessons, you do not even tuck it in in the first place!
2nd, seriously, you are a senior. you have to make sure you're a good role model to the sec ones.
anyway, of course there is no improvement in our friendship. nobody made the effort to make things better. obviously if you just sit there and not do anything, nothing will happen, right? well, we once said we'll talk things out right? i guess we'll put that off. i'm not prepared physically nor mentally to be good friends with you ever again. even though i agreed to talk it out with you, i have already told myself that i want to settle this but i decided i couldn't bring myself to just have the same friendship as we did previously. it's true we're taught to accept each other, but i just cannot make myself accept what you are doing. i truly think it's a bad influence to me, and i am, afterall i'm very easily influenced.
i know we haven't been talking for AGES. and i really did that on purpose. this will help to not cause what is happening to become worse.
anyway, i've decided that i didn't want to continue talking to you like normally in the past, even after we clarified things out.
i still remember : So what? i'm charis this is my personality.
or something like that.
you tell me, if you really want to "salvage" this friendship of ours, and you don't put in any effort to change- will it work? NO! not at all. if you aren't willing to change then i really don't see the point in clarifying all these? come on if i cannot accept you being this way and you aren't willing to change do you still think i'll be able to accept you? If i have to FORCE myself to accept you and FORCE myself to continue the friendship we had before, our lives would be terrible. and for that i'd be called a hypocrite - on one hand i'm acting like i really love being by your side, having your company and not minding the way you do things or what you do; but on the other hand i'm complaining and thinking of what you have become and whatever you are doing are just not acceptable in my eyes.
it's like getting blindly matchmade- you're forced to marry your fiance whom is someone you really don't like - you can tell me your married life would be blissful, happy and is all that you've asked for? NO! definitely NOT.
i think you'd rather choose someone you love and marry him - then at least your married life would be happy because you're with the one you love and he's always by your side.
so, what would you choose?
i'm sure it's the latter.
i really have tried, and even if you don't think so, i dare to say that i have tried.
perhaps like what others said, it is the wrong approach..
but i've tried to talk to you.
i've tried to get you to change.
i've tried to make myself accept you for who you are.
i've tried to put up with all these.
but i just can't.
i told you your body is the temple of God.
1: cutting yourself.
you said, "try only what, not like i did it 5 times. "
don't you say i didn't try to help you.
when i heard that i was really very very very disappointed.
how did you even come to that stage?
i still remember what i said to you " don't even try."
and i remember all that you told me.
come on.
2: photos.
i'm sure you remember what went on.
so, i really have tried. i really can't.
anyway,i can assure you that the times we had together in the past was really pure joy (if that's how you want to put it)
yup. i also didn't expect it to turn out this way.
HOIYAN!!: HELLO partner! (: haha yeah dearly missed ): we must go out okok? :D
roohi: haha who who?
